No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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