Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
