HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Randomize
