No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
