wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Just pee around me
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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