Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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