i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
where are my eyebrows?
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