im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
