Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I need to calm my uterus...
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
