I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize