so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
We don't watch enough power rangers
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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