anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Randomize
