dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
