Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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