So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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