there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Randomize