It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
