I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
