Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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