I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Houston, we have a squirter
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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