I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
