We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Randomize
