Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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