She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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