How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
whose parrot is this?
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Randomize
