i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Randomize
