I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
