I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Randomize