um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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