Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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