i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
This house was built for laser tag.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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