All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
You're completely useless in the revolution.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
