I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
We need to rekindle our bromance
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
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