She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
