Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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