quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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