I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
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