Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
i think i have herpe
just one?
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Randomize
