well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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