Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
