Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
