Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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