Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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