What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
25 Children of Helicopter Parents Admit The Most Horrible Thing They Were Put Through
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.