Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(515): View more from Iowa

does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(515): does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine http://tfl.nu/uuy6

Replies (2) Good night (1031) Bad night (457) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(858): View more from California

ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(858): ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me. http://tfl.nu/yno6

Replies (4) Good night (2366) Bad night (677) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(256): View more from Alabama

I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(256): I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light. http://tfl.nu/687c

Replies (21) Good night (741) Bad night (3527) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(540): View more from Virginia

Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(540): Also thongs make me have to fart a lot. http://tfl.nu/ra92

Replies (5) Good night (551) Bad night (4028) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(850): View more from Florida

I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(850): I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :( http://tfl.nu/5wo6

Replies (51) Good night (766) Bad night (3374) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(614): View more from Ohio

I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(614): I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook http://tfl.nu/grvu

Replies (20) Good night (575) Bad night (4337) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(+44): View more from England

You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(+44): You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway. http://tfl.nu/z6cq

Replies (34) Good night (5913) Bad night (1282)
Favorite
(561): View more from Florida

Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(561): Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade. http://tfl.nu/fybc

Replies (77) Good night (590) Bad night (7250) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(214): View more from Texas

I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(214): I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed. http://tfl.nu/5k49

Replies (20) Good night (6664) Bad night (1089)
Favorite
(484): View more from Pennsylvania

The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(484): The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit. http://tfl.nu/31my

Replies (18) Good night (679) Bad night (3825) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(206): View more from Washington

obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(206): obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol. http://tfl.nu/y9qf

Replies (6) Good night (2958) Bad night (748) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(336): View more from North Carolina

This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(336): This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level. http://tfl.nu/cqt6

Replies (12) Good night (4053) Bad night (1114) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(403): View more from Alberta, CA

Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(403): Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex http://tfl.nu/ohy9

Replies (13) Good night (1943) Bad night (503) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(250): View more from British Columbia

I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(250): I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes... http://tfl.nu/uyv6

Replies (4) Good night (1003) Bad night (318) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(703): View more from Virginia

I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(703): I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car http://tfl.nu/t9eq

Replies (1) Good night (615) Bad night (309) Order T-Shirt

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: