You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
