I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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