Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
im calling her cock vulture from now on
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
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