dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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