What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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