Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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