Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
This show inspires me to have sex in space
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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