break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Randomize
