The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
